Monthly Archives: January 2014

My friend reported on Facebook this morning that her child came home from school singing ‘Baa baa pink sheep’. A quick internet search revealed that my worst suspicions were true. Some nurseries and schools have banned Baa baa Black Sheep so as not to cause offence.

Is this not political correctness gone mad?

This made me think about other nursery rhymes, much loved by both my children and my grandchildren.

Georgy Porgy is a definite one for the chop. He kissed the girls and made them cry. Now, if the girls can’t even kiss grandma now, imagine the trauma caused by Georgie Porgy’s unwanted attention. That one’s binned then.

Mary had a little lamb. Hmmm…..it’s fleece was white as snow. Clearly an example of white supremacy. What about the other sheep whose fleeces were a bit imperfect? Yup….that one’s out too.

There was a crooked man……oops.  This one is a non-starter. Could we change ‘crooked’ to ‘bent’ maybe. Erm….no. ‘Slightly lopsided’? Nope. We’ll have to ditch that one.

What are little boys made of? That’s got to go as it is defamatory to boys in general. I actually know lots of boys who are sugar and spice and lots of girls who are snails and puppy dogs’ tails. Anyway, it is insulting to snails. And puppy dogs.

Three blind mice. Well, aside from the poem being about blind creatures, that farmer’s wife exhibits extreme cruelty in the blatant cutting off of innocent creatures’ tails. Has to go.

More animal cruelty in Horsey Horsey. Not even allowed a little rest.

Pop goes the weasel – more animal cruelty!

Ding dong bell, pussy’s in the well. Dear me. Even more animal cruelty.

Tom Tom the piper’s son. Crikey! He stole a pig and then made off. When he was caught he was beaten. We can’t be reading that to our little ones.

As I was going to St. Ives, I met a man with seven wives! No, no, no.

Looking down a list of nursery rhymes for inspiration brought to my attention how realistic they are for us today. Life in ConDem Britain:

Diddle Diddle Dumpling – having to wear his trousers in bed because he can’t afford the heating.

Jack Sprat and his wife having to share a dinner because they only got one meal from the Food Bank.

Little Tommy Tucker – busking on the streets so he could eat.

Old Mother Hubbard – when she got there the cupboard was bare. Another candidate for the Food Bank.

The North wind doth blow and Rain Rain Go Away – definitely linked to the Environment Agency job and budget cuts.

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She could afford a shoe?!?

Pease Pudding – clearly a northern delicacy – but having to eat it nine days old? Yuck.

I seriously wonder whether common sense has just gone out of the window. I also wonder whether anyone with black skin is seriously worried that children sing about a sheep who happens to have a black fleece? It’s a good job that nobody in authority heard the lullaby that my mother-in-law used to sing to her children. Now that would have been banned!

It is official. The world really HAS gone mad!

Today brings the news that children shouldn’t kiss relatives as it might leave them open to sex exploitation later in life.

WHAT??????

Well, on closer inspection of the article, it actually says that children shouldn’t be ‘forced’ to kiss relatives which is fair enough. But really….

I’d be more worried if my two beautiful grandsons didn’t experience cuddles and kisses from me and granddad.  Children thrive on love and affection – believe me, I’ve seen children deprived of it and they are deeply marked by the lack of it.  The bond between grandparent and grandchild is so special and woe betide anyone who dictates to me about how to behave in this respect.

I think some people just need to get a proper job.

Another day. Another person telling us what ‘schools should do’. Another time when I shout at the TV ‘What do you think we’ve been doing for years??’.  I get really fed up with people who know nothing about education telling schools what they should be doing. Every school I know has a bullying policy, an internet safety policy, a child protection policy. In fact, when I finally gave up teaching, our school had a policy for just about anything you could think of. These were not just pieces of paper paying lip-service to situations. They were working documents with standard procedures, obeyed by all staff. The only difference between teaching in 2008 and teaching in 1978 in my experience was that everything was committed to paper. Much of what is written on those bits of paper is common sense. If you witness bullying or a child tells you they have been bullied, you act on it. It’s a no-brainer. The difficulty lies in the child telling someone in the first place. Every child being bullied worries that by telling they will make things even worse.

Cyber-bullying is much harder. Schools often have divided opinions about nasty messages being received at home and how far their jurisdiction should extend. When does online bullying become ‘nothing to do with school’?

I remember a few years ago, a student told me that her friend was having an online relationship with a man and they planned to meet up. I was very concerned that this girl knew nothing about this person’s real identity. So, I rang her parents to discuss this and ask if they were aware. I got a torrent of abuse for ‘interfering’ in their daughter’s personal life. I still maintain that if it were my daughter, I’d have been very grateful for the concern of her teacher but we’re not all the same.

The key to getting things as good as they can be is an open and honest relationship between home and school. Each should view the other with respect and have the common goal of caring for and developing each child positively. It helps that parents can view the school’s policies but if they feel they are not being applied, they should feel comfortable about raising their worries directly with the school management. By the same token, whilst teachers don’t believe everything a child tells them happens at home, it should be important that the teacher feels they can ring to discuss any concerns which have arisen.

I get exasperated that schools seems to be responsible for all society’s ills. In many cases, school is the one constant in a child’s life. Teachers take that responsibility very seriously. So please, government, news companies, general public, before you tell us what we ‘should’ be doing, research what we actually ARE doing and have been doing for decades.