Dog Poo

You all know what is coming now, don’t you? There is nothing worse than standing in dog poo. No, correction. There is one thing worse and that is your children standing in dog poo. Apart from the fact that it stinks to high heaven, it is liable to tread into the house unnoticed, you have to clean it off your shoes (NOT using a table knife, please) it is dangerous. 

The blatant laziness of some dog owners is unbelievable. They just allow their dog to ‘perform’ wherever it pleases and then walk off, leaving their doggy ‘do’ sitting there waiting for some unsuspecting passer-by. Now I have to say that the majority of dog owners do clean up after their darling little sweethearts and they can be seen walking along the footpath, proudly swinging their orange Sainsbury’s carrier bag, knotted, with its weighty treasure hanging pendulously within. Good owners!

But some wouldn’t demean themselves to scoop up Poopsie’s little poopie, or Toby’s Toxic Turd.  They don’t care if you stand in it or you slip on it. As long as they don’t have to take responsibility for their dog’s actions, they will blithely skip home, doggie in tow.

I do have a dog. I have had some horrendous dealings with poop. I remember one particular holiday in France where I had to leave Mr Whinge guarding the mound whilst I found the nearest shop to buy baby wipes, bottled water and anti-bacterial hand gel to clean up the unexpected mess. The French looked on in amusement at those crazy English, washing the pavement. But I could no more leave it and scarper than I could do my own business on the pavement.


2 responses to “Dog Poo

  1. As a warden at a local country park I am torn between which ‘present’ I prefer most. The doggie poo bag filled then hung on a tree as a decoration – I assume its some form of modern art that I have not yet understood – like painting in elephant poo? Or the dog poo in the long grass that vaporises nicely all over you when you come to strim the area.

  2. Not a nice thought. My grandmother once watched from her bay window as a man walking his dog carefully bagged up the little darling’s droppings and tied the bag handles into a neat knot. She commented on what a good owner he was. (This was really a long time ago and before owners really did this much.) She then gasped in horror as he then lobbed the full bag over her privet hedge and into her garden.

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